I've always liked writing...

In small things is where happiness lies

2012-01-23T21:11:00.000+01:00

As I am sitting at my small desk in my full-of-books room, I cannot stop but think the small things that make me smile, make my heart lose a beat, make me cry from happiness.

It is the ability to call my family without worrying about the international call charges, it is my sweet dog that everyday waits for me to come home. It is my professional stamp that signals that something that I have wanted for -probably ever - is here and is real. It is the bus that I take every day to work and the steps that I walk up to, to find my self in a "tribe" I am proud to be a part of, not because it is perfect, but because I feel connected to them and our reasons for being there.

It is indeed that small details make the difference. It is a matter of perception and the way we approach things. Try and think every day as a milestone in your life, try and think about it as if your approach can change your life for ever. Do things that matter to you and be good to your soul and to others. Do not settle for a situation because it pays you well and you can afford a beautiful apartment. Fill up your heart and your soul, not your suitcase.

Find what you love, find what you are ready to stand for and make it your commitment for life; call it a job, call it your business, your project whatever... Be an enterpreneur, be a public employee, be a private employee, be a parent, I don't care. Do whatever matters to you, don't spoil your life in trivial things and organizations that don't appreciate you. Do it and do it with your heart. I promise to you, by the end of the process, your perspective on how you see the small and the big things will have changed.

Have a good night!

Petroula

Without heart

2011-12-14T20:38:00.000+01:00

"You are the heart" a precious new friend wrote to me recently. Shock and realization strikes. It now makes sense. I thought this whole thing that I was experiencing was for someone else, but no, it was for me, as well in so many different levels that I could not even imagine on the flight, metro and train that I took on my way there. A feeling that I was fighting to keep away for some time came, blew me away and lifted me to the wind...beautiful!

"Horis kardia" (without heart in Greek) is the song in repeat right now. I am loving it, not only because it is performed by my favorite singer but it is the Greek cover of another loved song, which brings back great memories from my 2 years in Holland. I love what life reveals to me everyday. I love its challenges, the sad times, the loved ones around me, the dilemmas that I find my self that help me realize what really matters. I love to discover the power of the heart, its ability to make us see things in a whole new and different way, the way it makes us fall in love all over again with the things that were just there...close to us, next to us the whole time.

It just takes a bit of heart to listen a bit more, talk a bit less and understand each other stories, fears, vulnerable spots and real passions. A little bit more heart, a tiny piece of that can change our everyday routine and give another meaning to the rain, our coffee and our messy room...

I don't have any other wisdom to share, I am still in that place where I am in peace with what is inside and outside of me and I am grateful for everyone and everything that has until now appeared to me and will reveal to me in the future...! A tiiiiny bit more each day...

Some crazy people...

2011-12-02T20:52:00.000+01:00

...leave their jobs to pursue their dreams. Move to the other side of the world to find love. Risk their comforts in order to help other people... I am proud to be able to call them my friends.

Some other people don't. Fair enough. With no good, there would be no bad, with no people staying back, the people that risk would be nothing worth mentioning...perhaps:-)

Some other crazy people find their passion and talent and live from it. They create their own businesses, they become successful employees and they put their mind and soul into it. Some others go to work and wait for the weekend to live.

Some crazy ones, hear the voices inside them that tell them the truth and try to bury the other ones, the bad ones, the ones that tell them "Give up! It's not worth it...". Some people are just deaf or have not learned the "language" that their self speaks to them.

Socrates said that the ultimate wisdom is "to know thyself". Some people do, they are conscious of their needs, their imperfections, their talents and are able to listen to their soul. Some people go where the wind takes them and live a life trying to fulfill somebody else's wishes; their family's, the society's...

Some pretend to be funny. Some others pretend to be serious. Some just pretend. There are these crazy people though that are just themselves, with their funny, serious but honest and authentic moments.

Sometimes I wonder what the future holds. Then I take a deep breath, close my eyes and say "Chill...". Somewhere I saw a child coming in the tram, sitting and opening the newspaper to read. He was not able to read and his whole attitude reminded me of the 40 year old man sitting next to him...

This has been a life changing week for me. I am about to embark on something that I dreamed for months. The voices come and scare me. But then, I smile at them and tell them "Chill..."

Good night.

Frequency

2011-11-17T23:51:00.000+01:00

I like the frequency of my blog posts. They are driven by an internal need to come out. When they come out they are smoother, easier, less scary and less exaggerated. I like that.

I like reading my previous ones. They make me smile, sometimes cry, but most of the times excited to see how things have advanced and what has changed since then.

I am in Athens these days and each one of them has been great, despite the whole political and economical crisis! The day though is approaching, when I will need to pack and head to the airport and go to my second home. I am scared of that day. I get this pain in my stomach and the weight on my chest, as if my suitcase suddenly gains 20 more kgs. And then with the thought that I will see some very special people and a more special one, the weight goes back to its normal size. Funny, isn't it?

I am thinking to myself of the surprises that will come in front of me and I am open to receive them, whatever they may be.I appreciate my health, the health and the love from my loved ones and the fact that I am still searching, looking around and being curious.

Petroula

Education with character

2011-07-07T21:23:00.000+02:00

It's not my quote. Gandhi put simple words around what many of us have tried with complicated and elaborate words to describe; education with ethics, moral learning etc etc.
In the past year, I have decided to go on a journey to discover (first) and then follow my Element. It was not a discovery really, cause I somehow knew it was always there. After a few months of reflection, challenging discussions with friends, family and myself, I am confident and happy that I have found my purpose, which is nothing else than Education, as a mean to develop young people.

Enough with my personal boring story though. The question is more important and relevant. How do we create an Education with character? How do we teach ethics? Currently, it's not the knowledge that is missing to our leaders (politicians, corporates, teachers), but ethical and responsible leadership. How do we teach that in our schools and Universities, to ensure that as people learn math, foreign language and Corporate Finance, they also learn how to apply their knowledge in an ethical and responsible way? Why Religion related courses are the only ones that usually talk about ethics? And why is developing knowledgeable, ethical and responsible leaders not measured as a success of an educational institution? We rather choose to count success by seeing in which firm someone was hired, how much salary he/she negotiated and which ranks he/she obtained?

And it's not just ethics that are missing from our education. The current generation and the next will need to answer dilemmas that have to do with intervention to the DNA of human's and other species, usage of nuclear and chemical weapons etc etc. Do we prepare people to make such decisions for their and their children's benefit?

It is a bit weird...

2011-04-08T15:05:00.002+02:00

Huge earthquake in Japan. Terrible event. Millions of people affected, millions of others run to do fundraising events, send their love and support in any mean they can. An event caused by nature. Could we have foreseen it? Perhaps not. Could we have stopped it? I guess not. Do we want to avoid future such situations? For sure! No doubt about that.

Children die in North China, due to poisoned milk. Japan nuclear alarm. "Rebels" are "accidentally" hit by NATO in Libya, apology denied. Ivory Coast fights. Thousands of people fight every day for their lives, better conditions, food and above all... freedom. Events caused by humans. Could we have foreseen it? Yes! Could we have stopped it or enabled the best result? Yes! Do we want to avoid such future situations? Well, here the answer depends on what we are to lose, because if by keeping someone under our control, we benefit more our wealth...then we may just lift our hands and say "That's none of my business".

A bit provocative comparison, and don't take me wrong, human pain and wish for something better is not to be compared, there is no less or more, no bigger and smaller not more and less important.

It feels weird, though, to know that the majority of the global community prefers to send money/clothes/ show constant support to a situation caused by nature and not try to change straight away what can actually "fight" for and against: humans. Once the story is no longer in the front page of our favorite news web-site, we forget it. We assume that someone else will take care of it, while at the same time we will go to the post, stand at the queue to send money to support our fellow citizens that have been "hit" by nature's "anger".

What does that say about us? Do we prefer to fight against an invisible cause? because in that way, we can never lose...? or, do we choose not to stand straight, continuously, with all our strength and power against the known dictator, the "evil" with a name and surname, with a house, blood and veins, where there the result can be only one? Either we will win or we will lose.

What does that say about the reasons behind our actions?

I' ve always liked writing...

2011-03-23T15:03:00.002+01:00

So, I am back, after almost 1.5 years. No comment about that, a lot of reasons and excuses, somewhere in the middle lies the answer.

I am not a great blogger I know that. I am nor the best at the new social media, I have no twitter account, don't know how to add cool applications at my blog, I just stay at the basics, the power of my stories, my thoughts, my questions and myself. You like that? Great! Not enough? Even better, there are soo many better, more elaborate and more fancy blogs and media out there! Please go for it...and then come back and try to teach me something:-) hopefully with more success than the previous ones that have tried to:-)

It has been a very interesting one year and a half. Lots happened personally, professionally and still a lot of things are happening. But the past is gone, I live hear and now, excited for the future, but taking each breath at a time...

Perspective is a key word. Experience is another one. Experiences help us to gain perspective on parts that we have not until then seen, felt, tasted and learn from them. They help us to understand the world, the others but most of all us. I lacked and still lack perspective I think, therefore I am now more open to learn.

Approach and attitude. I rush to make conclusions, about issues, people and topics. Hasn't happened to you as well though that you wake up with a nicer mood a day and suddenly your coffee is sooo delicious that you hadn't noticed before? Or you look so beautiful that everyone is staring at you, your eyes are shining and your friends and colleagues ask whether you are "on" something? Just kidding. It's all a matter of approach and attitude. That is the key for managing life and self and not let yourself fly around with the wind...

Living a life with purpose. Dot. Punkt as the Germans say. Telia ke pavla in Greek. A lot of people say it, but a few do it. Having already 28 years in this world, I feel there is a time to also give back, enjoy the world and its pleasures as much as possible, but also live for a purpose that I believe in; in all its forms, sizes, ages and ways I stand for more ethical, educated, responsible young leaders! My intervention way will be through their education and relevant experiences they receive when they are 5, 10, 15, 25 or 30...

After spending 6 months back in Greece, I miss it more than ever. Yes, things are hard, people are different, we are downgraded by the minute by all the possible rating agencies in the world:-)...However, we still know how to laugh, enjoy the bit of money that we have and find a way around. Atenistas, lunch groups, volunteerism, entrepreneurial spirit and so many other things is what is coming out. People that take responsibility and change things right here, right now. How else can a hero of daily life be defined? We do need more mass, we do need more awake minds in any way they can, always with respect and responsibility for us and the generations to come.

I guess that's enough for a small introduction.

TC

The tipping point

2009-10-30T21:48:00.002+01:00

There is something interesting about the world we live in. We are so different, so diverse, so weird and crazy, but deep down we are moved by the same motive: to prove to ourselves that we are unique. We do that in different ways: by making loads of money, by being top actors/musicians/painters, by being activists, by being great parents, amazing partners and lovers, by having great careers...

Where does this need to be unique come from? Is it the habits of so many years that have passed through our DNA? Is it passing from our families and societies? Or is it our soul and its uniqueness that drives that?

Probably there is no one answer, but a combination of a lot of different things. What is more important is where we direct this need of ours; do we direct it towards good or not? do we direct it towards fulfilling selfish needs that are against the rest of the people and nature, or towards improving the place we live? We have seen so many examples of people that have done so much good in their attempt to be exceptional and unique, but also so many to the opposite.

I strongly believe that there is something great and exceptional in each one of us, which we probably haven't even realized. Can you imagine what the result would be if suddenly everyone would actually realise their unique point and start using it for the best? Then, nothing more is really needed, neither big strategies nor great governors to lead us. Is this so hard to do? Is it that we have come to believe we can do nothing? that change takes yeeeeeeeeears and millions of people? Have we come to believe...that there's no hope?
Who? Why? When did that take place? Did I lose something? I mean, I know I dont read the news everyday, don't have TV, don't talk to everyone in the street, but did someone actually say: "No, you are not allowed to use your uniqueness for improving your life"... As far as I remember, quite the opposite. I see the opposite messages everywhere, in the internet, in books, in the TV, speeches, movies...everywhere.
then why don't we do it? Is it fear? Is it ignorance of its power or is it that we don't care?Again, there is no one answer, as we are so diverse, the source we operate from is also different. But again, there are so many great people that do it daily. Probably, instead of us trying to understand what prohibits people, we should focus more on what actually makes them tick, move, risk and try to be better...

Finishing off, I wander, what is that "tipping point" that makes/would make people move? act, tick, wake up and have them fight to apply their uniqueness for the best of all of us?

Petroula

Goodbye Johnny

2009-09-16T23:49:00.003+02:00

I am one of the millions fans of the "Dirty Dancing" movie, where "Baby" and "Johnny" discovered themselves, their love, their dreams and their values
This Monday, Patrick Swayze, who played "Johnny", left, after fighting an amazing battle with pancreatic cancer...but all that you know.

Funnily enough, friends and family called me and messaged me to tell me, ask if I am OK, tell me that they are sorry, as if I had lost a family member, a good friend, a lover...
Of course, I never met him in my life, don't know from first hand experience how he was personally, but being positive I have no reason not to believe that he was a great man and that now he is with his angels...

Anyhow, I am not writing this post to say how great he was, as I didnt know him...but to express why probably so many of us (mostly girls) were connected to these characters, what they symbolised to us, or at least to me:-) so that a lot of you out there realise that it is not a silly 10-year old excitement for someone with great body and hair...but much much more...

For a lot, Johhny was our first love, maybe for me as well...He was totally the man fitting into the "prince on the white horse" image, as was the alternative guy saving the princess from her misery, her boring life...it was the "bad" guy, who fell for a simple girl, not that pretty girl, and dared to step up and claim her, knowing his true feelings.

Nobody knows what happened afterwards, there was never a Dirty Dancing 2 continuing the same story, the story was left like that, at its best, which again made it beautiful, classic and pure...in a way...like how all of us wish our lives to be, and wish our relationships to be.
I am sure all we, the fans, believe that Johnny and Baby stayed together until the end, had beautiful kids that taught them how to dance and were as loved as the first time...or maybe not. That doesn't change the past and the fact that for a specific period of time, 2 people loved each other so much that they stepped up from their boundaries and claimed that love...

Johnny was the man who was gorgeous, in looks and in attitude,because he knew what he wanted and he knew how to fight for it. His words were honest, authentic, he was passionate, lived life to its fullest, hard working, dreamer and yet someone who respected his friends, loved ones and people that also respected him... He was a man that saw the soul, the character, the moral of the baby in the corner and gave her his hand to help her get out of it...not for any selfish reason, but for her. But Baby on the other hand was not a victim, she was also a fighter in other aspects of her life, she loved with aaaaaaaaall her heart, was fearless but again full of respect for her family...

Now, tell me, don't you think that our world needs more of the above? I think so...no. I am certain, that's why I dedicate this blog posting to "Johnny", the guy which every...every woman dreams of

A gift

2009-07-19T00:49:00.003+02:00

They say that with a gift, people usually express their gratitude, love, admiration, appreciation to someone. That gift can be from a box of chocolates to a trip to the moon, from a poem to a song, from a smile to a hug...

There are also some times that all the above seem not enough, cause it is just hard to explain what you feel about someone, your admiration and gratitude for the role they have played to your life...
I will give it a try though, through my blog! Because I think this world needs more examples of great people, people that help us to be the best of what we can...

I therefore dedicate this posting to a Greek friend of mine that recently got married. Her name is not important (either way she doesn't like her name that much:-P)

I would say she is like a sun...you know, the sun has its own light and though that it lits up everything...? like that...

So, my friend, you should know that all this time we have been away from our city and our country, you have always been the one keeping me close to it, either with the way you look, the way you cook, the memories we have of our city and the university and that we share everyday

I wanted to thank you because since February especially, your e-mails and words have helped me to be more strong, confident and have helped me to continue developing and being able to forget and maybe at some point forgive the "akatonomastos":-)
...you have helped me to heal the part of me that was hurt and that is so unique!

I also thank you for every "kalimera" and "filenada" that you tell me, cause that is the best news I can get in a day and I look forward to it every day...

In the end, I just wanted to thank you for just being there. And, in case you haven't realised, your love between you and your husband is what keeps me up and hopeful...cause I know that true love actually exists, it is only a matter of time until we find it:-)

I wish that the angels keep you and your love safe!

Petroula

Justice

2009-05-11T20:57:00.002+02:00

What is it? who defines it? who says who is right and wrong, who decides what is correct, fair and who is to judge what each person deserves...?

In short, I don't know. What I do know though, is that life can be unfair and fair at the same time. Our choices, destiny or god can make us feel the most lucky or the most unlucky people on this world. Funny feeling...simply because it doesnt allow you to complain and be miserable, as then you would appear ungrateful...

In any case, no matter what, there is one thing that each human being deserves, it's almost like a right that should never be taken away, a right that is given by nature in the moment of birth and that noone has the right to take it away from another person...unfortunately, there are only a few people that have or had the blessing of actually sensing it...

I am referring to love. That tiny word that wars, crimes, art, cities and many more have taken place. A word that moves the world I think, with people acting with it or trying to find it...

A good friend of mine has birthday today, a person I have referred to my blog at some other point as well, a teacher of life, a mentor, a brilliant and handsome man that has inspired a lot of people around the world.

So, my friend, today, when the world is celebrating your existence, my wish goes out for you and hopefully someone there listens to it...I wish you justice in love, because only the people that appreciate it as much as you do, they deserve to experience it to its full potential!

Petroula

That's just the way the story goes...

2009-05-01T21:54:00.002+02:00

The title is a line from the song that is just playing on my radio.
I ve never believed in coincidences. I am certain there is something written for us all, our destiny, even though seems unclear to us, it is all clear for someone else...call it God, call it time, call it Destiny.

Our choices are what determine this destiny. I read an interesting blog by D. Pollay, http://davidjpollay.typepad.com/. Oh man! I wish I had that "Happiness Label", as David mentions, before I make my choises, then I would probably have avoided some ... but on the other hand, would I have become wiser, learnt as much, come where I am now? Probably not, I would have learnt other things though, be somewhere else, better or worse I will never know! And that ignorance is such a blessing! I am happy I don't know the life I ve missed, otherwise, I would live with dreams and "ifs" and I think, no, I am sure, that is a form of hell.

Enough is enough though! There's enough of risky choises a person can make and I think I have reached that level. Now, it is time for me to play it safe. Yes, it sounds harsh and silly and coward, but I cannot afford losing more. Because in the end of the day, I need to find that person that I complement and that complements me. And in the end of the day, I need to be also professionally fulfilled. As per the famous quote " There is nothing more powerful than an idea, whose time has come" And I would extend that for feelings, visions, drives etc...

April in that way was such an eye-opener. For how I see myself, for people in my life, for my future and what I am of. The result is that I don't know, I probably have said it before but that's when yout think that you have it all figured it out, life strikes again and you are left numb.
Yeah, I am 26, I probably should have figured out more things for me and what I am to do in this world, one thing is for sure: I do not afford to lose more time, cause everything else appear trivial.

Reading my post again and reflecting, I cannot stop myself from wondering whether I am being ungrateful of all the things I have and have achieved and scared that again life has another lesson to teach me...very soon

Take care all of you!

Petroula

Heaven and hell

2009-03-23T19:19:00.002+01:00

In a lot of books, people talk about heaven and hell. Christians have this picture in our mind that hell is a horrible place with fires, tortures, blood etc etc, while heaven resembles a peaceful into the clouds place, where everyone is light like a feather, smiling and enjoying...peace.

It's nothing more than a state of the mind and soul. For me, hell is like seeing in front of you the best of what you had and knowing that you will NEVER have that again...
not only seeing, but almost being able to touch or smell it...but almost, cause you never touch it or feel it.

It's like having in front of you the best memories of your life, the people you loved the most in your life, your family, your best friend and knowing just knowing that these memories are just that. Memories, they are over, done, belong to a past that now not only you cannot have, but you should not bring back to your memory too often, because the more you bring them, the more you realise what you missed/are missing, the more you bring them, the more they hurt you and the more they hurt you...the torture continues forever and ever...

And if and when you manage to think less, you forget everything and your soul leaves you. Because with forgetting/de-attaching, your link to what pulled you up as a human being, disappears and then what..? yes, in the end, you lose it

It is like a drug, even though you know how bad it is for you, it is the only thing that makes you feel better, even for a short time. You are afraid to leave it, because you don't wanna live a life without it, you don't want to forget, because otherwise you will be lost and the more you remember, the more "down" you go...

Even worst, hell is seeing these beautiful people/memories in front of you and knowing that you could have spent 5 more minutes with them or enjoying more that moment, if you only had realised how unique they were, instead of sleeping, spending these 5 mins in the shower etc etc.
It's the feeling of not being able to do anything, realising how you let these moments go and yet see them again and again and again in front of your eyes shouting at you " it is your fault as well...you let us go"

About heaven, oh well, it's the exact opposite.

Petroula

A song that says it all...

2009-03-15T19:38:00.000+01:00

" I'm yours", the Script

You've touched these tired eyes of mine
And mapped my face line by line
And some how growing old feels fine
I listen close for I'm not smart
You wrap your thoughts and works of art
And there hanging on the walls of my heart.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I may not look like much
I'm yours.

And though my edge is maybe rough
I never feel I'm quite enough
And it may not seem like very much
But I'm yours.

You healed these scars over time
And braced my soul, you loved my mind
Your the only angel in my life
The day the news came, my best friend died
My knees went weak, and you saw me cry
Say I'm still the soldier in your eyes.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I may not look like much
I'm yours.

And though my edge is maybe rough
I never feel I'm quite enough
And it may not seem like very much
But I'm yours.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I don't fit in that much
But I'm yours.

A day to appreciate and a day to hope for

2009-02-09T00:27:00.002+01:00

It was my birthday today. 8th of February 2009. If you would ask me 2 weeks back, I had imagined them different in a way. Unfortunately, sometimes life goes into directions we are not ready for.

In any case, it was definitely a day to reflect, think, sit and dialog with myself. As I mention above, a day to appreciate what I have in my hands, mind and heart and a day to also be optimistic of all the good that is to come.

Sometimes, the mind plays games to us. It demands more and more and is never satisfied with what it has. And that leads to a constant feeling of in-completeness but also forgetting to appreciate the people, the loved ones, the family that we have around and they love us.

It was also a day that I had to be optimistic about what will come and just from the wishes I got, I really believe that my wish, the one that I did when blowing the candles from the cake that Manos and Georgia brought for me) will come true. And yes, I am one of the billions of people in this planet, but I need to believe that.
They say when you take hope from people, is when you kill them and therefore I cannot stop hoping for...

Love,

Petroula

Did I lose my inspiration...?

2008-10-20T23:15:00.003+02:00

Yes...or...no...maybe? It's been a while, words just dont reach the keyboard to put a sence to my thoughts...and yet, just now, a song in my i-pod reminds me of the power of words, no matter if they are written, said, sang...

This is a greek song, by Mihalis Hatzigiannis "Pio poli" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7ZZ9BS92_c

Translation:
More
Ask me whatever you want about love
if it will exist after us
ask me for the borders of this world
for the difficult things you want to learn

Just dont ask me if I would die for you
coz the answer is so easy for me...

More than you dream
More than what you are scared of
than you dream when you sleep in my dreams

More than what you imagine
More than what you are scared of
than you dream when you sleep in my dreams

I love you more than myself...

Ask me whatever you want about the moon
if it will come down to get us
ask me if love can endure
in an orbit around the clouds

Just dont ask me if I would die for you
coz the answer is so easy for me...

More than you dream of
More than what you are scared of
than you dream when you sleep in my arms

More than you imagine
More than what you are scared of
than you dream when you sleep in my arms

I love you more than myself...
...

With that closing phrase, anything that I will write seems trivial and small...

Goodnight

Why is it that...

2008-08-30T03:30:00.002+02:00

we are almost blind to the people that make us happy around us?

Why is it that we ignore our instinct that we will get hurt and still go...fall on our face and do all the crazy things that we cannot explain?

Why is it that we close our eyes to people that would love us and hold us tight?

Why is it that we open again even after being hurt for the 100th time? believing that this time will be different...

Why do we look for love where there isn't and why do we close our eyes to it when it shines in front of us?

It doesn't have to do about men or women, we all do the same things, why...? why...?

cause deep down all of us look for some love. The love of a lifetime, the love of one night, the love of a friend, the love of our parents, the love that makes us feel that our existence in this world is important at least for someone...

This one is for you my friend, thank you for opening your heart tonight and for being so amazingly authentic...

It's one of these days

2008-07-20T13:14:00.002+02:00

That realisation strikes...

thinking of something random and realising that I don't know what is the situation back in Athens. What was the though? Ok..here it goes " How much would a pita gyros cost in Athens, comparing to Zurich...?" (I know, you are thinking now...such a deep thought from such a question??? Sometimes I even surprise myself...)

I have no clue what the answer is...the next thought was "How many days in total have I spent in Greece since May 05..." The answer? "not more than 60 days"

Don't get me wrong...I am NOT suffering by living abroad, but I am attached to my country and the thought that my memories belong to a Greece that is no longer there...makes me sad and scared...

Is this unavoidable? Or can I catch up and fix it...?

Do I need to look hurt for people to notice...?

2008-06-30T21:43:00.003+02:00

I injured my knee during a team soccer game...

The bandage makes it obvious, people care about me and ask how it happened, interested to see what the doctors said, if I will be better etc...

The pain is not unbearable, but uncomfortable, cannot fully function, do sports, run, dance, sit etc... The positive side...I made easily a lot of friends! Good point to start a conversation with someone you never met, a cool guy at a bar, the taxi driver etc...:-P

The doctors did their job, gave me some pain killers and sent me home...

That made me think...What about the other kinds of pain though? The ones that bandages and pain killers cannot do something about. The ones that people cannot see...

How do I let people know that...or how do they understand so that they come and ask me, show that they care? Do I need to look hurt for people to ask how I am and care about my well being? Do I need to be devastated, crazy, cry...?

It's a silent scream...from a lot of us.. a scream that only a few people can hear in that frequency...people that do hear it are either angels or cannot bare it. It is a scream for everytime that our heart is broken, torn, chopped and stepped over...every time that daily life seems trivial, the scream cannot be stopped by any corporate etiquette...

Where am I going? Just screaming silently for a bit less pain in this world and praying for less people being alone...

Scream! Tell people you love them! Tell them you hate them! Laugh out of happiness and cry in the middle of the street if you fell like! It's real...and it's you!

Mind shift through soccer

2008-06-15T14:26:00.003+02:00

Disclaimer: a lot of assumptions and comments based on feelings will be mentioned below, but they are mine so I guess I have every right to mention them

Euro 2004. Greece won the euro football cup. A team that initially noone was watching in the TV. Most Greeks didnt even know about the Games and definitely had no hope of our National Team winning. Trust in the team's potential? Zero. Only the team, the coach and their families...might have had some belief in the fact that they might do well...

Euro 2008. Greece is out of the cup from the first round of games. The stadiums are full of Greeks, I am sure a lot of Greeks have bought tickets for semi final or semi final being almost sure that our team will be there! A lot of people flew to Salzburg just to be there, not even in the stadium, but in the city...

Greeks are considered as people that complain and are pesimistic and a bit mistrusting everyone! everyone is an expert in other words...or thats what they think...

This is how soccer changed it.

One team was enough to a. bring people closer b. make people happy and proud and c. be optimistic, have hope, have faith in a new generation of people, fight and be there to support them!

Yes, people were dissappointed yesterday when we lost, I am sure the new players even more, it is tough to fill in the huuuuuuge shoes that their preddecessors had 4 years back!

But for me, the mind shift came and I do hope it will continue. For the first time, my fellow citizens said "u know, I dont know the new team very well, but I know where they are coming from and I know they will try and give it all" No complains, no bad feelings...

My take away: this is what we need more in this world. People believing that some others will do good, they will try and do their best and no matter how things come in the end, noone will lose because there is no greater happiness in this world than feeling part of ONE team, one effort and that people believe in you...deep down...they appreciate you for every single thing of who you are...

Dreams in a plastic (recycled) cup

2008-05-26T00:11:00.002+02:00

I am not sure what it is with us women; the fact that we have convinced ourselves that beauty is hidden in expensive bottles that carry a famous name...actually, usually, the smallest the bottle, the bigger the promise for eternal beauty...and larger the bill as well..

At least some of us take it more seriously and do some exercise, take care of our diet and not overdo it with chemical products

Is LOVE the reason? Is this the source that we operate from? Our need for love or the fact that we love ourselves?I don't know, i hope it is a mix for both. I hope all of us do love ourselves, otherwise would not take care of us so much, right? but we also aim in sharing this love with someone else special...

Human body is like a house. As the owner, I want to have it clean, modern, pretty but I also dont wanna keep it just for myself. I wanna share this beauty with other people as well so that they feel comfortable in it...comfortable, not jealous, envy

And what about the soul that lives in this body? Do the above leave time for the mind to progress and be as beautiful as the body? Imagine this beautiful, perfect house with inhabitants that are dirty, unsociable, impolite, unfriendly etc...then the house is useless... and it will soon turn into the opposite than what it is now...

But a beautiful mind is always shining and making everything around it shine, glow, sparkle...

If I ever had to choose between the 2, I would choose the second. Only then I can share what I have with others...but until then I just enjoy of trying to be beautiful in both

Petroula

Nostalgia

2008-05-21T20:38:00.002+02:00

This month it is 3 full years that I am away from home...I didnt even plan or realise when the 1 year became 2 and now already in my forth...

I like living abroad, it is a matter of opportunities, you see ... but nothing can ever replace my "patrida", the place I am from, the land that a lot of people know because of Plato, Maria Kallas, Melina, Olympic Games, feta cheese, beautiful islands, gorgeous girls and syrtaki dance...

And YES! I am so proud that everyone around the world knows my country and that's why I miss it so much...every single moment, every time I look at my window these days and I don't see the cloudless blue sky with a dazzling sun and the smell of spring afternoons...

I grew up in the big city, Athens...old town...no...seriously...really old! but at the same time so alive, vibrant, modern, fast pace, exciting, stressful, traditional, melacholic...that makes it so amazing!
My city...ahhhhh...my city is a woman! She wants to be loved because she loves everyone living with her...she is so beautiful that for centuries now the beauty of the people is breathtaking...she is so fast that even stuck in a traffic jam you see its vibrant characters everywhere! It is the city of Plaka with its outdoor taverns, Psirri and its cafes under the acropolis...the walks under the Parthenon...the corn smell in the summer...the couples expressing their love everywhere, anytime, any place...

My city lives! I miss summer nights, when the whole city is at bars and cafes until laaaaaaaaaate in the morning...and when the clubs in Paraliaki (sea side) are not enough...then you have all these spontaneous beach parties with camp fires and people with their guitars (or not) just singing...or up to Likavitos with a beer and their radios tuned at their favorite station

And even if you don't have the money to have that lifestyle, the city has the best house and street parties...nothing special, just friends gathering to enjoy! Enjoy life! despite the fact that they work double for half salary of any other European, they suffer from traffic jams every day, the health system is a mess, education is expensive, jobs are a few... My city is life itself!

That's why I feel nostalgic, there...it seems that all the big issues become tiny...nothing is as important as enjoying life! So what if you are broke every 10th day of the month, are 27, and still live with your parents because you cannot afford it...you just lighten up a cigarette, drink some beer/coffee/retsina and...and smile of happiness...authentic, true, honest, deep happiness

2008-05-11T19:30:00.002+02:00

I feel I need to write something...where do I start though...? let's see what comes...

I was watching Pangea day yesterday at my place with some friends and some people that decided to join my event at home, it was unique and memorable...its the times when you realise that you are not alone in this world thinking that the only solution that people can become happy is only when we come closer and understand that we are all the same...we all love, hate, envy, are happy, sad, need love, are passionate etc.. and the messages amazing, from an Israeli and a Palestinian that had lost relatives in "battle" coming and holding hands and crying to each others arms, to films from South Africa and India...it was great!

I realised again how much I miss my "rugby" team-my 2 teams from AIESEC, at my time in Rotterdam-I guess the feeling of being part of a whole...but not only that...making "the whole"...creating it...

Had a great lunch by the See in Zurich, in 10 mins the sun left, heavy clouds came and started raining like hell...while the wind was blowing so hard that the umbrellas flewwwww:-) everyone started panicking...but we were in the middle of the "hurricane"...in the most peaceful spot...

It's Mother's day...and mama Maria is celebrating:-) it must be hard to live away from your child...you know what they say that parents need to let their kids grow up, develop etc... and soooo many parents live far from their kids...and then some couples say...I cannot live far from my wife/husband...but how can we live far from our mom/dad...? the kind of love is not bigger or smaller...it's different...why...?

A good friend has his bday today, he is the man that for shows what LIVING LIFE at its maximum means...I am so proud of him!

Where this posting goes, I have no clue...i guess to one thing...
I want to say a huge thank you to all the people that have allowed me to love them, be part of their lives in any way and were interested in who Petroula is...

These random lines are for you my family, my friends, my loved ones, for you that have come and passed...for you that are still here and for all of you that will come...

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but ... but what?

2008-04-09T18:31:00.002+02:00

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be...
That is a quote I found somewhere today...and it left me thinking about it the whole day...

Is it actually like that? and maybe my question is coming from the fact that I am not a native English speaker (as you might have realised) and therefore do not fully grasp the exact meaning of all the words.

What is the intention and what is the need? What does it mean going somewhere and what being somewhere?
What is the possibility of a may and what is the certainty behind I think...?

Sometimes we give to quotes too much of importance...as if people say wise things all the time..."Goodmorning..." Awwwwwww...what did he mean by Goodmorning...etc etc etc...

For me, the above words (the quote) is a good excuse for people that did not fulfill their dreams to say " Oh, I am OK now, this is what I needed actually and now that I have it it doesn;t make sence to go anywhere..."

So what if you spent all your childhood dreaming of walking on Mars, now you go nowhere without GPRS because you are afriad you will get lost...

So what if you spent hours...days...weeks...reading about design, film, theater etc...now, reality has hit you on the head and the only thing you manage to do is to have a well decorated house...

So what if you were dreaming to do something good for this world? Now you are spending your most productive years alone in a 15 floor building, its midnight and your dinner is a cold sandwich...for what? For which purpose...? Do you know?...cause I don't...

Cause I can bet all my money that people don't need this...human beings don't need working 18 hours a day, bad nutrition, stress, being serving the 25 bosses they have over their heads...

One of my favorites poems is Ithaka, by C.P. Cavafis, where he sais that the journey is more important than actually reaching the destination because the journey offers you experiences, knowledge and shapes what the destination should be...great! But...there must be a moment or some moments of fulfillment, otherwise the journey becomes a fight that will never be won.

Interesting.

For you...

2008-03-29T16:14:00.002+01:00

This one is for you...

there are times in life when you cry of happiness and some others that you burst into tears feeling the most miserable person in the whole earth...

there are other times that you feel that the sun is shining just for you and some others that a huge grey cloud is covering you 24/7...

Some times what you wanted becomes a forgotten dream, but sometimes the hidden wishes crawl up and make you scream...

For the times that you felt in love, loved, attracted there were moments that you felt emotion-less, not able to love and be one with someone...

the mornings that you wake up with an awful hangover are the ones that remind you how precious life is, healthy nutrition, water and make you promise to yourself that next time...one beer would be enough...

for the time you lost someone from your life, mind and heart, this helpless feeling pushed you out of bed into your most beautiful dress...when it is -10 and snowing outside...

for the times you realised your life is in a bubble, you looked again around and saw something you had never seen before...

there are moments that you dont understand why...that is the moment that you find your answers of why things cannot always be explained...

for when you felt so lonely that questioned your impact in this world, your phone rang, a skype chat started and a friend added you in facebook...

When you thought you had a plan, life turns everything around and you are left there wondering how tomorrow will look like...

...A friend came for dinner, need to go...thought I had more time

Anyway...that's life!

Why?

2008-03-14T22:26:00.000+01:00

Because it is an expression of myself, my thoughts and feelings, probably more than I can express by words...that's why I keep a diary...

Because I want my thoughts to reach others and maybe in that way I understand more of myself and the world around me...that's why I e-mail my friends...

Because I believe that there is something common in us all, in me, you, that guy sitting in front of his TV, the girl getting ready for her date in front of the mirror and feeling 16 again...that's why I share my thoughts with all of you through this blog...

Petroula